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’ ‘I don’t believe that,’ I said. ‘You had skill. You had technique.’ ‘You probably can’t even describe what I did. It wasn’t because my tongue moved to this spot or that. It was because you were emotionally involved, not in me, but in kissing. If you got the same technique from a poodle, would you say it was great kissing?’ ‘Yuk. What a disgusting thought.’ ‘Exactly. The first time, your attitude was so lousy, nothing I could have done would have been any good for you. The second time your attitude was so good that almost nothing I could have done would have made it bad for you.’ ‘Well, maybe,’ I conceded. ‘But I still have my doubts.’ ‘You know, it’s the same for most things. If you go in with the attitude that it’s going to be a positive experience, that you’re going to enjoy yourself, you almost always will. When you go with a chip on your shoulder, you rarely enjoy it.’ That resonated. When I went to a party with an attitude, it always sucked. How did he know so much about people. Since his initial name was an invention and he didn’t want to share photos I didn’t know much. Did he work for the local government? Or was he a well-known businessman? Could he be a minister in an evangelical Christian church? Evidently he had time and resources to offer free massages and to host the men whom he massaged. I guessed that he had a house in the suburbs and that his wife was reliably away at work all day. But would he mind some random guy parking his car in front of his house and walking in? How many guys did he massage in a week? Certainly the neighbors might notice and say something to his wife.And he didn’t know much about me. I told him what neighborhood I lived in, indicating my social, economic, and maybe even political status. But I couldn’t reveal everything about my life, not in an email exchange with a stranger.We talked about dogs and the coast and traveling around the northwest. I asked about his hobbies, and my new friend responded,I love to ski. Both water.
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